Before I begin: I came into Fastweb’s Student Contributor program thinking that I have the knowledge it takes to help fellow students get closer to being the best image of yourself you could possibly be—but to be honest, I’m not doing so good myself. I don’t know what you guys are going through; some of you may be at the highest point of your life, while others are staying up until 3 a.m. listening to their “sad vibes” playlist; the point is, stable or not, sometimes we all fall into a funk. So, instead of giving you what I think is the best advice, I have decided to share what has worked for me, hoping that my tactics can help some students.
Some of you are just like me, a struggling high school student trying their hardest to just get by with their grades; some of you like me, trying to fight the voices in our heads that keep telling us were doing it all wrong; some of you are like me, looking for a way to shut those negative voices up—just for a few seconds so I can think and finally get some work done.
Well, today you might find the answer. I’m not qualified to give professional advice, so I can’t guarantee that my process will work for you; these three tactics over time my voices fade away for just a short while. Here are the three ways I’ve managed to stay sane this quarantine….
1: Positive Self Talk
A Lot of the time we feel stressed or lost, and the best thing we need is to stop, breath, and ask ourselves, What is it you want? What is it that I’m trying to achieve? and How can I make this a reality? We tend to be so focused on achieving a goal that we forget to check up on ourselves and really think about how we are doing.
Usually when I take the time to talk to myself, the first few minutes only consist of the negative comments that overpowered my concentration in the first place; for the first few minutes I only fuss and scream and let myself down, then when I run out of things to stay I sit in silence and slowly feel the sharp pain in my head fade away. I breathe in and out and after some silence, I remind myself that what I’m doing has purpose. What I’m doing is pretty darn good considering that I’m giving it my all. I remind myself that I’ve been through worse and I am capable of achieving the goals that I set my mind to. I talk to myself reassuring that success will come one day if I just keep trying. Once I’ve given myself the motivation needed, I pick up from where I stopped.
2: Take Brakes
Sometimes a bit of silence and a short pep-talk from ourselves is not enough time to rid the stress that we are feeling—sometimes we need a mini-vacation. Walking away from your work to clear your head and restart your mind for a while can really help. Trust me, I do it when I’m working on homework….or really, when I’m dealing with just about anything with a given deadline.
For me, math is the worst subject in school. After spending hours on a problem, trying to get close to one of the multiple choice answers, I tend to step away for a bit and catch up on a few episodes on the current show I’m watching, or read a few chapters in a book. And yes, it may sound irresponsible and maybe it is because I’m choosing Netflix over homework but hey it works! I use this tactic almost every day and I have A’s in all my classes (except math). When I don’t have a passion for something, I find it really hard to focus. Time off from my work helps me refresh my brain and really gets me motivated to restart after a short break.
3: Manifest It
This summer I have learned about this new thing in the psychology field called the Law of Attraction. Basically, take a few minutes of your day and manifest (if you don't know what that means, it means make something clear to the human eye or mind, in this case we're making it clear to the mind) what you want to achieve. Really picture yourself living the life you want to live, and it will come true.
I know what you are thinking, but it’s true. To be honest I thought the whole thing was bogus at first as well but believe me this actually works. At first, I thought all my manifesting was just a waste of time, but I kept at it and kept imagining my life as a senior editor for my own book publishing company—then it happened. I got an email from Fastweb looking for students who are willing to write articles. Now here I am, writing first piece ever that is open for everyone to read!!!
But the thing about manifesting is, just wishing for it is not going to get you to your goal. You must work for it as well. This is how I made sense of the whole thing: manifesting works by you imagining your goals becoming a reality and because of the image you put in your head you only excite yourself more about the idea, motivating yourself to work harder on your work. Manifesting is something that takes time and a lot of patience, but if you commit, you’ll really start to feel motivated toward your goal. Manifesting has really helped keep me motivated and going these last few months.
These three methods have kept me stable these past few months. I am not saying that these recommendations are going to work for everyone because not everyone is like me. You may feel better after ranting to someone about your problems, others might need more than I could ever offer, and for some, this was a complete waste of time. If you are like me, and hate talking about your feelings I recommend reading some self-help books, these really helped me too.
I will leave you with a quote from a Netflix show, “It’s Okay to Not Be Okay.” It guides me daily: “Hurtful, painful memories. Memories of deep regrets. Memories of hurting others and being hurt. Memories of being abandoned. Only those with such memories buried in their hearts can become stronger, more passionate, and emotionally flexible. And those can attain happiness. So, don’t forget any of it. Remember it all and overcome it. If you don’t, you’ll always be a kid whose soul never grows.” - Ko Moon Young