Write a Great College Admissions Essay

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I love the way you word your piece. Willingly I will take this story as an inspiration,also I would like to say I love how you detailed it.Taking this all in is so new and fun, i'm glad that I got to read this so I can better myself.And for that I thank you greatly!

It Runs In The Family
By:Kelsey DeBord
As I walk into the familiar house of my Great Grandparents, I begin to notice things I never really did before. Maybe it was because of this assignment, or maybe my own maturity level had changed since the last time I had laid eyes on the mounds of pictures covering the walls. The photographs of past students and college graduates from long ago were, of course, completely common to me. But taking a closer look I realized that in his life, my Great Grandfather had known all these people and has most likely touched them in some way as he does everyone he meets. Far more surprising were the thank you notes of support from the likes of Nancy Pelosi, Bill Clinton, President Barack Obama, Al Gore, and former Governor Martha Layne Collins. "Wow," I thought to myself, :This is really my family?"
Elvin Combs was born on August 2, 1923...or possibly July 7, 1923. One of the most interesting things in my opinion about my Great Grandfather would have to be the fact that he doesn't know when his exact birthday is. "Social Security has it as August 2nd, so I guess that's what it is." he tld me. Of course, when you lie about your age as much as he did, it's nearly impossible to know when your real birthday is. He worked in a coal mine after dropping out of high school, and was much too young to really be employed there. So, he used the name of his older brother and worked at a coal mine in Happy, Kentucky (yes, it's a place) for around 3 years. This wasn't the only time he suddenly became older, however. He also had to exaggerate his age when he enlisted in the Army during World War II. I don't consider this the most interesting thing about his war experience, though.
Years ago at the beginning of World War II, my Great Grandfather decided to enlist in the United States Army. He went home that day to inform his father of his decision. His reply> :Son, I'm going with you." This was especially shocking because his father was at least 44 or 45 at the time. But of course, I've always believed that serving your country is about your heart, not physical ability. I guess my Great Great Grandfather believed the exact same thing. So, off they went to fight for the United States in World War II, father and son, side by side.
Elvin was sent to New York City, and was stationed there for quite some time. One of hiis duties was to guard a field behind a house on the outskirts of Buffalo. Little did he know that the woman who would turn out ot be my Great Grandmother lived in that very house. "I saw her walking down the street one day and she whistled at me." he told me. "No, I believe it was you who whistled at me." she replied. Whoever caught the other's eye first, they were later happily married with five children, one of them being my Grandmother. They also had twins, Larry and Jerry. One would turn out ot be Magistrate of District I in Madison County, and the other would win the primary election to become Sheriff. I guess you could say that my family has a tendency to be good at winning people over.
We all remember the infamous invasion of Normandy during World War 11. My Great Grandfather was just three days short of being involved in that invasion. "My battalion was supposed to be in that invasion,: he said, "but we were delayed for three days, and we still don't know why.: I would consider it a lucky coincidence, because we all know how bloody the battle of Normandy turned out to be. It isn't the only time he has dodged bullets, however.
During his childhood, Elvin was living in Jackson, Kentucky with his parents and four brothers and sisters One day, a family friend became very upset with my Great Great Grandfather and pulled a gun on his wife and daughter. He fired once, and missed. Thankfully, one of Elvin's brothers was quick enough to get my Great Great Grandfather a double-barreled shot gun to retaliate. He shot, and dropped him right on the bridge across from their house. The man survived, and he took my Great Great Grandfather to court. Unfortunately for him, the Judge Executive was this man's Uncle. He was sentenced to three years in prison. However, the Sheriff in Breathitt County was my Great Great Grandfather's cousin. :Just go on back to Hazard and don't come around here anymore. I won't arrest you, it was only self defense." he told me. He did as he was told, and came back to Hazard. There were warrents out for his arrest, of course, so he got quite a clever idea. When he came home from work on the weekends, he sat on his porch in a dress and bonnet, so no one would discover who he was. He was later told that if he could prove he had been in the military, the charges would be dropped. A parole officer collected evidence from his house and took it to the judge back in Breathitt County . Ironically, when they were searching for his case files, there was no evidence he had ever been charged with anything. All that work for nothing.
After the military, my Great Grandfather worked for the CCC (Civilian Conservation Corps), a government program set in place as part of the New Deal proposed by Franklin Roosevelt. The group was founded to help build roads, bridges, highways, etc. for the government. He spent aroiund two years building a road with that organization , and was also a member of the NYA (National Youth Agency). He went on to be the physical education teacher at Berea College. making 35 cents an hour. He worked there for over 40 years.
What baffles me about him, however, isn't everything he's accomplished in his life; it's his heart. When we were discussing the war and all the friends he made during it, he told me about the men who fought beside him whose lives were taken as a result. I could tell he was tearing up, which isn't extremely uncommom for him. His heart isn't large for just people though, but for animals as well. Having a horse, two dogs, two alpacas, countless cattle, and a very large number of ducks and geese, he's quite the animal lover. He treats every one of them as if they are people, no matter how small or large. I think we could all take a lesson from this. It shouldn't be about what you look like, what species you are, where you came from, or who your family is. All that should matter is that we came from the same God, who loves us all, and who my Great Grandfather is a strong believer in. May we all see him as an example.
"What greater thing is there for human souls than to feel that they are joined for life- to be with each other in silent unspeakable memories." - George Eliot

That is really good advise. I'm trying to get into grad school now, and this is a real wakeup call. Thanks.

thax!