Roommate relationships can go a multitude of ways.
People end up being the best of friends, they can’t stand each other or they just tolerate the other person with no real relationship.
Of course everyone wants the first scenario to happen, especially since most people don’t know anyone their first week.
But, if your roommate situation has been moving the opposite direction, here are a few ways to cope.
Number 1: Talk it out
This is the first thing you should do!
Most roommate issues can be solved with a quick conversation - just a few simple words to the other person.
Approach the situation as calmly as possible, keeping any anger and aggression out of the conversation.
State what your problem is, how you think it should be addressed, keeping an open mind about your roommate’s perspective.
And please….don’t leave passive aggressive notes. Nobody likes those, and they never
work the way you want them to.
Number 2: Get some help
Talking to a friend, or even your R.A. could give you some helpful advice if the first approach didn’t work out.
Although it sounds a little like you can’t handle things on your own, getting an R.A. involved can be the trick that some problems need.
Many dorms require roommates to submit a roommate agreement, and those are hard to enforce on your own sometimes.
Definitely get help with your roommate if you think you need it.
And don’t worry about “getting your roommate in trouble” by asking your R.A. for help. Most R.A.’s are very understanding and helpful.
Remember, they are students too and aren’t out to get anyone!
Number 3: If nothing else works, move out.
Although it sounds drastic, this happens all of the time and I have seen it more times than I can count. I’ve witnessed people move at the end of the semester and I’ve seen people move in the middle of the week.
People have moved their entire lives out of a dorm within an hour to get away from their roommate.
Moving out is always an option if you talk to your residential services program and your R.A.
Being comfortable with where you live and whom you live with is really important in college. If you don’t feel comfortable where you are, college will be much harder for you, both socially and academically.
Don’t be afraid to ask to move out of your room or even your entire dorm if you think it will make you feel better. Campuses usually have a few options for students to consider if things aren’t working for them where they are.
And one thing to remember: you are not the only one with these problems. So many people have gone through bad roommate situations and will after you. You are not alone and it’s definitely not a big deal.
I promise, one day you will look back on your bad roommate days and laugh.