Back to School Blues
Sometimes you miss the comfort of home, even though you enjoy college.
January 14, 2013
It’s almost time to head back to campus and dive headfirst into college life again, but, to be honest, I’m not really feeling it. I’ve gotten used to being at home, with no classes or any real responsibilities other than making it to work.
Somehow the past month has flown by without me even realizing it. I’m not even particularly sure how I spent my time here: I know that I had my wisdom teeth out (not the most fun thing in the world) and watched a whole lot of The Office with my brother, but it feels like it’s still that first week of break again. I should probably be itching to return to my life at school, but strangely, I’m not.
The thing is, even though I didn’t do a lot, I’m not bored of being here. I could definitely use a few extra days to get to the point where I actively want to return to my home-away-from-home.
As it is, despite the ever-growing stack of textbooks that have been arriving in the mail over the past week, I’ve kind of forgotten about school. The fact that I’m really, truly in college and will have to go back in a few short days hasn’t sunk in yet.
Maybe it’s just that, as a freshman, I haven’t been there very long, but I almost feel like last semester was just a dream.
I know that once I get back to school, I’ll love it; I just like being here, too. I like getting to go back to a job that I love and that I’ve had for a while; I like being fifteen short minutes away from my boyfriend; I like getting to play Apples to Apples and Qwelf with old friends; I like getting to shop at Target (my tiny college town has many great qualities, but its lack of a Target is not one of them); I like hanging out with my brother and my parents; all of that is familiar, and fun, and not something that I want to leave.
But at school, I’ll get to do equally fun things, like movie nights with people I’m just getting to know and all the activities that my college puts on (the a cappella performances are to die for).
I’m ready to go to all my new classes—especially since my schedule is full of courses that I’m excited to take. I’ll get to make new friends, become more involved in all my campus clubs, learn a lot, and have all the experiences that generally make college great.
Home is restful; college is, too, but in a different way. Here I can unwind and relax, and there I put my nose to the grindstone and feel good about the work that I’ve done. Here is yin, and there is yang—which is probably why I feel so conflicted about going back.
Maybe I should make a new semester resolution to find more balance in each. At home, I will try to pick up the pace and be more productive, and at school, I will try to find more ways to unwind. In the end, all I can do is just keep moving forward and try to improve.
How do you feel about having to go back to school after being home for awhile?