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Live With Your Parents After Graduation?
By Peter Vogt, MonsterTRAK Career Coach
April 21, 2009
If you’re thinking about moving back home with your parents after graduation or have already done so, ask yourself this: Do the pros not only outweigh the cons, but substantially so?
Nearly half of this year’s college grads say yes. In MonsterTRAK’s 2007 survey of college students and recent grads, 48 percent of the Class of 2007 said they planned to boomerang home for at least a little while postcollege. Moreover, 42 percent of the 2006 graduates surveyed said they’re still living at home.
Why Go Back Home?
More often than not, the reason why many new grads are picking their parents as roommates is all about money.
“For as many as 40 percent of recent grads, it made smart economic sense to move back in with their parents, where life is comfortable and rent is either low or nonexistent, while they get their finances in order,” says Nicholas Aretakis, author of No More Ramen: The 20-Something’s Real-World Survival Guide. “Don’t forget that the average college student today graduates with more than $20,000 in tuition debt.”
Most new grads have important life plans that cost more money than the typical entry-level salary can cover. Take Bryan McCarty, a 2007 graduate of Wartburg College in Iowa. He recently accepted a writing job in his hometown of Cedar Falls so he could move back home until next summer, when he’ll be getting married.
For McCarty, the decision made sense. “I thought about the opportunity to build a stronger, more stable foundation for myself and my fiancee,” he says.
There are a lot of advantages to making home your next move after college.
Pros and Cons of Living at Home
McCarty’s conclusion is reasonable, says Bill Coplin, author of 25 Ways to Make College Pay Off. But the financial argument has several potential downsides as well.
“First, the graduate lives at an unrealistic level of comfort, making a break for independence difficult,” Coplin says. “Second, the financial pressure to stick [with] a job and work hard is not there if he can quit and not become homeless. Third, it’s frequently a sign that the new graduate is unwilling to be an adult.”
Indeed, people might think “you still haven’t grown up or aren’t mature yet” if you still live at home, says 2007 Villa Julie College graduate Jessie Merryman, an office manager for Rovion in Maryland who lives with her parents.
Or you might feel that way about yourself, as 2005 University of Arizona grad Francis Reyes did after moving back home to San Francisco to start his career. “I soon learned that this decision hindered my intellectual and financial development as an adult, i.e., true responsibility,” says Reyes. “I felt as if the move back home was a regression. I became comfortable and lost the drive and focus to work on my career.”
So Reyes recently relocated to New York City, where he works in public relations. He says he has had not only “a rebirth in my career, but [also] a new lease on life and a clean slate.”
Make Living at Home Work for You
Your mileage will vary if/when you move back home with the folks. To enhance the pros and minimize the cons:
- Set a Mutually Agreeable Time Limit: “There has to be a clear timetable as to how long the [grad] is going to live at home,” says Carol Symons, a 2006 University of North Carolina-Wilmington grad who works in client services for Your Office USA. Shortly after graduation in May 2006, Symons began a graduate program. She figured out it wasn’t for her and moved back home with her parents in Cary, North Carolina, for four months.
- Symons’s last bit of advice: “Actively…be either pursuing a graduate degree or hitting the pavement looking for employment.”
- Make Sure You Save Money: “Not having to pay rent or buy food will literally save me more than $6,000 in the next year, if not more,” says McCarty. “Now, I can shift my focus to saving and creating a financial foundation for myself and [my fiancee].”
- Do as Much as You Can Yourself: Pay for your own food, or contribute to your parents’ mortgage payment each month. Handle your own comings and goings, and solve your own interpersonal problems at work. The more you can act like your parents’ renter versus their child, the more prepared you’ll be to leave the nest once and for all someday — and fly.
This article originally appeared on Monster.come.

carrieUnderwood
about 1 year ago
ya of course, you wouldn't have to spend a ton on room & board
Bailey259
over 1 year ago
Personal Loans
clevelm
over 1 year ago
Look, all you people who say its a step back to live with your parents again arent taking into consideration that the US economy is the worst its been since 1929 aka the great depression. Now i have "older" parents compared to most students, but i still know that my parent never had to deal with the world in which we live in today, whith little good jobs availabe and smaller and smaller salaries coming our way. Living with your parent wont make you more dependent again if you've already made up your mind to grow up and stop living off your mommy's and daddy's money, and living at home is not using their money. In todays world this just makes sense for those not getting the jobs they intended when they enterd college. And beside who want to live with their parent forever, I know i dont. If you dont want to live with your parents, then your mind set is in a proper adult plce, but dont discount moving back in until you truly can handle yourslef. Dont relax at home, "man up" and look to move out into the world, just as my parents did in a world full of boutiful jobs and other oppritunities that although are not so available to us, they are availabe. So use some time at your parents house to balance out this terrible economy and work on getting that job you truly desire and will love after 2 years have passed.
kirbo979
over 1 year ago
Most of the time a goal is a step forward. If you have intentions on becoming something more than you are at the moment and school, work and independent living is working out for you then why would you take a step down. Although some people cant handle paying the bills it actually helps you to become a more reliable person in the long run. All i can say is stay independent even if its a struggle. If you cant do that then good luck in the real world. Everyone has to start somewhere and moving back in with mommy and daddy isnt always the way to go. Instead show them that you can handle yourself and i promise youll discover a new you. :)
Miss_Vampi
over 1 year ago
I really don't like the idea of moving back in with my parents. That's why I have roommates lol! To save some money~! We just split the cost of living, half and half. But going back to my parents would only kill my sense of independence. I'm not being ungrateful, but I just don't want anything else from them. I want my own things, getting it by my self, living by myself, trying to battle with reality. I would honor them and help them out if needed. But I really don't want to receive anything else from them. Sorry, I like it the hard way. My opinion.
NigelN9
almost 2 years ago
Like everything else, it really depends on what your goals are. From the previous posts, I got a taste of the vast world experience that everyone under 25 possesses. This economy is not your mother's economy... wealth will take much longer to build for the mass of us (not talking about all the derivative loyalists), so saving and building a strong financial foundation in a safe and nurturing environment would be a wise decision. I do agree with previous posters that there should be well discussed rules and boundaries before a final decision is made. Make sure everyone is on the same page. Decide that this will be a maturing process for you the dependent. If your parents choose not to accept rent from you, instead of spending it frivolously, save that money so you will be able to make a larger down payment on your own home or condo. It will be one way to decrease the hold your local mortgage bank will have over you when you do decide to purchase housing. You will also save yourself loads of interest payments. Who knows maybe family complexes will come back into style. Maybe folks will stay closer to home and families will once again return to the geographical closeness that dissipated when corporations required people to be super transient in order to progress up the corporate ladder.
JocelynB170
about 2 years ago
if we didnt mess up the economy no one would be moving with their parents because no one would want to
Gally
about 2 years ago
well, i'm a high school senior and i am currently in the middle of deciding whether or not i want to stay at home or stay on campus. but i have come to the conclusion that the self determination that experts say you lose from living at home has nothing to do with remaining in a comfortable place. in the end it is a mind set obstacle whether that person wants to focus on they're career or stay at home with their parents for the rest of their life. if one is dedicated enough, they'll will not be set living at home with their parents and they will think about the struggles of their loving parents in paying the debt for their tuition :)
Skorpfly
about 2 years ago
oh yes I was very very spoiled so you know what it could be a bad idea afterall xD
Skorpfly
about 2 years ago
im 18 and wanted to move out at 16 but i was a very bad kid back then now i realize how hard life really is and now my parents and family come first before my friends so soz peeps...plus my family owns a business so it wud makes sense to stay with them for a while. my gf sister is 23 and she just graduated from college and is moving back with her parents even if she did graduate kus of money so you know you shouldnt move on from family.
bside
about 2 years ago
Do unto your parents as you would have your children do unto you. Get your own life. They did.
And to all you cowardly parasites: If you are an adult, please act like one.
RobertoT27
about 2 years ago
Speaking from the perspective of a college student who chose to stay home and commute to save some money, I can honestly say that I defintily wish I had gone away for school. It isn't that I don't like living at home but when I go and visit my friends at bigger colleges I get a sense that I am missing something at my commuter college. What is missing I believe is the atmosphere of a college town where the majority of the people are relativly close in age. It's not that I dislike my college by any means I actually think it is a great school, but based off of personal preferance I would have to say that bigger schools with student housing definitly have more of an appeal to them to the majority because they have more to offer in the sense of community compared to commuter schoos.
JamesC847
about 2 years ago
I wonder what would be more responsible: Staying home and saving up enough money to have a 6 month emergency fund, or living on your own without a finanical foundation? Hmm... Also, I do remember that it was written somewhere that we are supposed to honor our parents. If you live at home, you can pay them some rent to help them out financially. =)
babytez
over 2 years ago
its not okay to stay with your family because they will exspect you to things that you dotn wont to but it will be more money to save if you stay with some one
MaggaleanM
over 2 years ago
okay..I understand that it saves money, but you will already be in debt so you might as well get a dorm.
I would not move back in the same house as my family because I have learned from being with them for five years that it is better to try to be independent that to have to rely on someone else to do things for you.