I clearly remember when I received my housing information packet in the mail. I opened up the thick envelope and out spilled about 10 sheets of tri-folded paper. I sorted through the blue, gold and pink sheets until I found the stark white letterhead: my designated room and roommates.
The power of that one sheet of paper must not be downplayed. This person or people would be my life for my first year in college. Would I like them? Would they like me? Would they be friendly? Would they shower?
The body of the letter was a blur, but the indented names and phone numbers were clear. I was assigned to a high-rise (14-story building) in a triple room on the 10th floor. One roommate was from Ohio, the other from North Jersey.
I didn't want to live in a suite, because the thought of cleaning our shared bathroom grossed me out! Plus, did I want to risk living with four people as opposed to one (or two) in a triple?
When filling out your housing application, make sure you fill it out on your own. Letting others' opinions influence where or how you want to live may be something you'll end up regretting. Plus, you tend to be more honest when you're by yourself.
Make sure to divvy up your big belongings with your other roommates, such as TVs, microwaves and refrigerators. I know many rooms that have more than one TV, but for other appliances, it's better to decide who's bringing what. (And it prevents you from taking up valuable space in your parents' car.)
One you get there, establish some standards of living. It's probably the last thing on your mind as you're trying to get adjusted to your new environment, but nipping certain concerns in the bud like smoking, partying, music, use of belongings, etc., is a lot easier before they occur.
Communicate with your resident assistant (RA) if any problems arise. They are there for you to utilize and will be the neutral force in handling any roommate conflicts.
Finally, if you happen not to mesh well with your roommate, file for a room change if your school allows it. Your college experience can be stressful, and your room should be your haven to escape and relax. If you find yourself loathing your room or feeling unsafe or uncomfortable, don't ignore your feelings -- take care of it immediately.
In my situation, living with two other girls was taxing at times, but definitely shaped my college experience for the better. We were agitated with each other, which is to be expected, and there were nights when there was no communication. We were respectful of each others' space most of the time, and avoided any big flare-ups by addressing things as they arose. We pretty much traveled in separate social circles, which was nice, since we didn't spent 24/7 together.
That's another area to touch upon: When choosing to room with friends, think about it twice, three times, even four times. I've seen some friendships ruined because of living together, which can be the most unfortunate result. My BFF and I agree that we could never live together!
Lastly, have an open mind. As an RA, I have run into many situations that could have been avoided if the roommates just kept an open mind. If you are not accustomed to a certain lifestyle, that's totally fine, but remember that college is a learning experience. You will learn about different cultures, orientations and lifestyles. And that's one of the best parts of college.
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